School ain't what it used to be....

Demon came out of school giggling yesterday.  I asked her what she was laughing at.

Demon: We did speed reading practise today.
Me: ok....
Demon: Someone read about a lady who had a baby.
Me: Oh right
Demon: She said it was like "shitting a melon!"
Me: WHAT?!
Demon: It's ok, we told the teacher.
Me: Who gave you the book??
Demon: The teacher...
Me: Oh.....
Demon: Then somebody else read another book and that had loads of pages about female dogs....
Me: ...erm???
Demon: You know...THAT word!
Me: :-O  Where did she get these books from?!
Demon: The library.

Teacher has obviously not read the books methinks!!  Demon knows the word 'bitch' as I used it about Stella. 

Me: Stella's a bitch.
Demon: That's not nice!
Me: What?
Demon: Calling her that! That's not nice!
Me: ...that's the name for a female dog...
Demon: WELL I DIDN'T KNOW DID I?!

Hmmm. She knows the 'B' word but doesn't know the correct term for a female dog...mebbe I need to speak to the teacher!!!